Sometimes our lives cross paths with the issues of the day and what is revealed crashes us down not only into the depths of darkness’ shadows, but also into a new understanding of the illusion of inhumanity.
In December, this happened to me. While the details of this experience are my own, the lesson, as is always the case with the lessons that people learn, is for everyone.
What I discovered was that when a huge world issue tumbles into our personal life, we become both a macro and a micro. There are no in-betweens anymore. Here sits the space wherein sides are taken.
Yet this taking of sides isn’t in a dualistic sense, Light vs. dark. Instead, I fully experienced this: there is Light, and then there are those who have not yet fully chosen to live in the Light. Either way, Light is present.
You see, what I found out from my experience was that even the most destructive individuals cannot completely hide the God-stuff they are made of. Those whom I encountered had to WORK at being dark. They had to get themselves into a space of viewing me as a thing. They had to focus and refocus again on trying to create fear in me. And yet, when I again and again revealed myself to be human, their first reaction was always a natural authentic connection with me. I saw their evil, but more importantly I saw it struggle to take center stage in them.
Even within those well-schooled in treachery’s game sits a very human essence that cannot be snuffed out.
I have come out of this experience unscathed. I have been able to protect myself, and so no crime has been committed against me. But this is also in the sense of being emotionally unscathed. Those of us who have put in the effort to heal and forgive ourselves are also the ones who can hear the cries for forgiveness from people who do not yet know how to forgive themselves.
Now, the above line sounds really good on paper. However, actually putting it into practice this past month has been a whole other story. Lots of emotions overtook me these last 30 days, and to be honest, a lot of them didn’t bear much resemblance to forgiveness. Luckily, just as my anger over what these people tried to do to me was kicking into high gear, I stumbled upon an extraordinary video by Vishen Lakhiani. In it, he outlines the concept of ‘radical forgiveness’:
What Vishen is essentially saying is that forgiveness isn’t some generic term to be thrown around as an ideal that we’ll all do “some day.” It’s also not about condoning actions or refusing to stand up to poor behavior; on the contrary, it’s meant to be a living document that uses our intuition to access our innate empathy.
By doing this, we prevent the dark actions of others from overtaking us and being spread around. The idea that hurt people hurt people also has an opposite: healed people heal people. Radical forgiveness reminds us that when we choose not to blame, we’re using the lessons we learned in our own lives to shine a flashlight through the layers of darkness and find the undaunted Light that is inherent in everyone.
Our true power as people lies in radical forgiveness. This is why those who try to pose as Kings wish to divide us. If we’re busy finger-pointing at each other, their power to cower in the darkness of deceit remains. Without radical forgiveness, we are easily fooled into believing that cowards are Kings. Forgiveness ensures that our Light is not used against us, but instead it becomes a Force that creates a new opportunity for hurt people to become healed people. This is the place from which Unf**kwithability arises.
In next Monday’s post, I’ll outline some steps I’m taking as I stumble towards radically forgiving those people who tried to hurt me. I’d love any advice or feedback from others who are on the same journey.
You can also check out the second part of this series Radical Forgiveness: From Idea to Reality.